Regrets, I’ve had a few…and that’s a good thing!
Jacob, I totally agree with you on the “failure” front. Having just graduated in May (and in school all over again in a school), I think a lot about the choices I made and did not make during my undergraduate years. There are certainly things that I would have done differently and maybe even wish had never happened–but the cliche rings true that I would not be the person I am today if it weren’t for those mistakes or missteps. The only reason I feel capable of being a grad student now, for instance, is because I just spent four years figuring out how I learn best. I used to be obsessed with flash cards; call it a stubborn high school holdover, but I insisted on making flash cards for just about everything throughout my freshman year of college even when they really weren’t the best study tool. Eventually this dawned on me (probably in the form of red marks all over a blue book exam) and I realized that I had to explore other study techniques to find what worked best for me.
I also regret how much I pushed myself into a certain double major “box” from the get-go and then had to pull myself out when I realized that what I thought I wanted to do as a high school senior might not be true forever. I started out planning a Diplomacy & World Affairs/Theater major, but my last-minute decision to drop a theater class and try out Race & American Politics was possibly the most liberating moment of my undergraduate career. The realization that I was in charge of my academic path was extremely powerful and I’m so grateful that it happened because I ended up very happy with my Politics major/Spanish minor. Sometimes I look back on how frenzied I was as a freshman, trying to map out a rigid 4-year plan, and wonder whatever made me place all that pressure on myself in the first place!
Along similar lines, I experimented with so many extracurricular opportunities. Although some of them were definitely not good fits from the start (i.e. wish I’d known that Assistant Business Manager for the college newspaper meant folding and stamping copies for 200+ off-campus subscribers. Every. Single. Week.) I am glad that I allowed myself the flexibility to explore a variety of options. Otherwise, I never would have found the ones (writing for aforementioned newspaper, writing advising, Orientation team, etc) that felt truly fulfilling.
It’s easy to look at mistakes we’ve made and call them “regrets” and “failures.” But those words have such negative connotations, I think that we are better served to view these instances as learning experiences instead. Easier said than done, I know–but so worth it when we come out on the other side more prepared for the next challenge.
